Friday, July 30, 2010

Happy Friday!

Thursday, July 29, 2010

Like Nails on a Chalkboard

Most of you know what I do for a living - I sell beer. Sometimes the sell of beer warrants a phone call from a customer. A call will sometimes go like this:


Beer Queen: Good Morning, BBD.

Order giver: Hey, is this BBD?

Beer Queen: Yes it is. Can I help you?

Order Giver: I need to place an order.

Beer Queen: Who is calling?

Order Giver: Juanita's Scrub Pub

Beer Queen: Ok, ready. What do you need?

Order Giver: *paper rustling* What do you sell?

Beer Queen: (Depending on the account I give the brands I know they carry - Bud, Bud Light, Ultra.) Bud, Bud Light, Bud Light Lime, Mich Ultra,...

Order Giver: You don't sell Miller Lite?

Beer Queen: Nope.

Order Giver: Heineken?

Beer Queen: Not us.

Order Giver: Yuengling?

Beer Queen: Those are the other people.

Order Giver: Coors Light?

Beer Queen: No ma'am.

Order Giver: What do we get from you again?

Beer Queen: (repeats list)

Order Giver: *rustling and movement, figuring out what they need*

Beer Queen: Would you like to call back after you have your order ready?

Order Giver: Give me ten minutes.


Beer Queen: Good Morning, BBD.

Order Giver: This BBD?

Beer Queen: Yes ma'am.

Order Giver: Ok, I have my order ready.

Beer Queen: Ok, what do you need?

Order Giver: Pony bottles, 3, Bud & Bud Light.

Beer Queen: 3 each?

Order Giver: 3 Bud Light, 2 Bud & then I want 2 Bud in the red & white can, 1 Bud Light bottle, 2 Bud Light can & 2 Bud Light bottle, 1 Miller Lite in the bottle.

Beer Queen: You said Bud Light bottle twice, so you want 3 and Miller Lite is not us.

Order Giver: Miller Lite is not you?

Beer Queen: Not us.

Order Giver: Ok, let me see what I want. I want 2 Bud in the red & white can, and 2 Bud Light bottle, 2 Bud Light in the white & blue can and 1 Bud in the red & white bottle.

Beer Queen: Got it.

Order Giver: I need a total.

Beer Queen: *gives total*

Order Giver: Have them call one hour before they get there. Wait, do you have Coors Light?

Beer Queen: No ma'am. That is the other people. We'll see you tomorrow.

Our customers are our bread and butter but I swear it is so frustrating being me sometimes. *sigh

Wednesday, July 28, 2010


I came across a blog that's content is mostly geared toward Nikki Sixx. Now, as you all know how I love this man but am not overly insane as to you get a tattoo of his name, name my kid Nikki or stalk him (not that he knows anyway). The author of the blog is a 15 year old female and she says that Nikki saved her life. I can understand that - I would flail in the water just so he would and save me and perform mouth to mouth. The author gives a time line of her life and the first age mentioned is 5 years old when she attended her first concert - Godsmack and New Tattoo, sees Nikki for the first time and notes this concert had a huge impact on her life.

Who takes a 5 year old kid to a concert like this? I thought 5 year olds were into Spongebob and fruit roll-ups or am I just severly out of touch?

Tuesday, July 27, 2010


When you sign on to follow a blog, what do you think you are following? The words, the meaning, opinions, ideals, the author? And by follow, where does it go? I will not lie - sometimes I will click a blog on someone's blog roll because of the title or the profile picture associated with it and am often misled but that is what I get for choosing a book by its cover. Sue me.

Just curious...I see blogs with tons of followers and yet only few comments. Example:

Jo has 775 followers but generally has less than 30 comments per post and she posts often. Her content is knowledgeable and I find her very readable and she relates very well to her following.

Heff doesn't show his list of followers but his AL-ANON sign up sheet shows he does have regular meeting attendees to the tune of 20 but I bet its more than that. His blogging is sarcastic, subliminally perverted and down right hilarious. The Heff has muy comments per post & he interacts with every commenter, always responds, something I rarely do.

I will not sign up to be a follower unless I know I can and will follow accordingly. I may not comment on every post, but at least every other one. Some days it feels like blogging is a job when it's meant to be fun - is that wrong?

Monday, July 26, 2010

You May See the Doctor Now

How many of you, including me greets the day with such fervor and determination, thoughts of good will and productivity, choosing to make the best of what may come your way? (no one raises their hand) As I've heard before the road to hell is paved with good intentions so is my positive attitude toward every day.

The reason for this post is because a co-worker and friend of mine will tomorrow begin the last leg of his journey to rid himself of cancer or at least to beat it completely into something that resembles a squishy grape. I can't remember exactly when his journey began but it was this year, possibly the spring. He has endured multiple radiation treatments, low dose chemo, a 25 lb weight loss, stem cell removal, potassium transfusions, bone marrow tests and tomorrow he will get the mother of all treatments which will include 3 weeks of quarantine, hairloss, mouth sores, nausea, diarrhea, an additional 15 lb weight loss and a 6 week sabbatical from work. He has definitely held his head high and his attitude is nothing short of amazing. He has never grumbled or even asked why this is happening to him.

So for those of us who cry and whine because we have indigestion, a headache, a tummy ache because we ate too much, because we have to get up and go to work, because we have to cut grass or fold laundry, think about my friend and realize that its not that bad.

Carpe diem.

Friday, July 23, 2010

Thursday, July 22, 2010

I Believe...

That every drop of Coca-Cola is laced with heroine because it so damn good and so damn addicting.

That we are puppets on a string.

That I have a higher calling than being a beer bitch.

That every time my GYN touches my boobs she wished she were lesbian.

That you can get no fresher Sunbeam bread than you do at Dreamland BBQ.

That grilled food can ignite cancer cells.

How you handle bad days is how you handle the majority of your life.

That the person who designed hospital gowns was a perv.

Butterfly kisses are freakish.

There was a bandwagon for Alabama - Auburn football last year.

That skorts are stupid.

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Sing Along Time


You are the love of my life
And you are the reason I'm alive
And baby baby baby
When I think of how you saved me
I go crazy

I've never known love like this
And it fills me with a new tenderness
And I know I know I know
You're in my heart you're in my soul
You're all I can't resist

And I need to tell you
The first time I held you
I knew you are the love of my life

I spent a lifetime waiting
Always hesitating until you
I was lost so deep inside my shell
'Til you came and saved me from myself
Now all I really know
Is I need you

And you are the love of my life
All the joy and tears that I cry
And baby baby baby
You don't have to say a word
I see it in your eyes

As we stand together
I promise forever
'Til the day that I die
You are the love of my life

I spent a lifetime waiting
Always hesitating until you
I was lost so deep inside my shell
'Til you came and saved me from myself
Now all I really know
Is I need you

You are the love of my life
You are the reason I'm alive

Love of My Life ~~ Sammy Kershaw

Thursday, July 15, 2010

Quote of the Day

"You will never change what you tolerate". ~~ Joel Osteen

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

As in the majority of most women's daily life there is some sort of diet/exercise plan. Whether the plan involves wine and cheese, martinis and the yard boy or a very precise regime it takes time and focus to accomplish what is set out to do. I am one who is not focus oriented and determination is not in my vernacular. But as in most things change can be good. So the goal for me is a 50 lb loss in no direct amount of time. I began yesterday with a 45 minute walk and no hooch. Doesn't sound like much but I am a gal who loves her evening cocktail and does not discriminate toward any type of intoxicating liquor but I believe giving up the hooch during the week will be a key step for me. When I consume "the drink" I don't walk any farther than necessary. The next hurdle will be relinquishing Coca-Cola from my weekly diet. None of the diet stuff will be substituted - cold turkey. I believe the unleaded version is just as bad for you as the leaded version. When I chug a cola it is a full on sugar and 140 calorie intake for moi. The final thing will be no fast food - no more Chick Fil A, Starbucks or anything with a drive up window.

I only posted this because I can't say I will do something and not do it. Now, I have to.

So I as set this ship in motion removing and adding things to make a more healthy lifestyle think about me as you are eating that medium rare steak with blue cheese crumbles and those crispy steak fries and washing it down with a perfectly poured Amberbock draught beer. I'll be the gal in the corner eating her waiter's face off because she is so damn hungry and delusional.

Thursday, July 8, 2010

Pushing the Product

"A friend in need is a friend indeed".

Stop in, take a look.

Tuesday, July 6, 2010


I wish time would slow down. We are already in the second week of July. School will start pretty soon, Christmas will join it shortly after, then poof 2011 will be staring us in the face

I spend 9.5 hours a day in an office. I wake up at 4:45am to be in the office by 6:30am if not before. The real work day begins at 7 am but I need the 30 minute jump start for appropriate world ruling. The work day ends at 4pm but sometimes it follows me home. No, I am not hourly. No, I do not rack up those 30 minute increments into 2.5 hours of comp time per week. I just do it for the love of the game. Ok, that is a lie sort of. Work is game but I do not love it so I do it for the nookie. That is another lie too. Who came up with a 40 hour work week? Who came up with 5 on & 2 off? Who? Who? Who? Sure, I get two weeks vacation, 6 personal/sick days and my birthday but what is the point of using any of the time when work seems to follow me on my days off too? I have to kill myself just to stay out the office for a full 8 hours. I haven't taken off more than two consecutive days since June of 2006 and that = four years without significant time off.

Yeah I know, go whine somewhere else. But really, I spend a majority of my time worrying about beer when I should be consuming it.

Can't I just get a sugar daddy? Won't any of you provide for me & allow me to live a lifestyle of long, lingering dinners that I didn't prepare & shopping trips to NYC?

"Women are meant to be loved, not to be understood" ~~ Oscar Wilde

Thursday, July 1, 2010

Things To Be Happy About

New tennis shoes.
Nikki Sixx.
A hope chest.
Plaid curtains.
Basset hound puppies.
Knowing right from wrong.
Snuggling in the morning.
Ice slivers floating on top of your martini.
Chocolate covered peanuts.
Best friends.
Taking a lov-ah.
Cherry chapstick.
Red fingernail polish.
"Never Gonna Be Alone".

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