Friday, October 30, 2009

Happy Halloween!

Thursday, October 29, 2009

Courage Under Fire

October is Breast Cancer Awareness month and what joggled my memory to bring the cause to bloggie central at this late date is because a fellow employee lost his wife to this battle this very month. Her name was Mary Thomas. Mother of 10 year old Miles and wife to Everage - a man who is humble and strong in his faith. I've been sending Everage inspirational quotes of encouragement & comfort since his return to work. Yesterday I sent him this quote:

When you get into a tight place and everything goes against you, till it seems as though you could not hang on a minute longer, never give up then, for that is just the place and time that the tide will turn. ~Harriet Beecher Stowe

His response :

Thank you. God is good.

After all he has endured his faith never faltered. I wish I could be more like him.

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

And the Award Goes To....

As if my life couldn't get any better, The Queen of Mean ate bowl of nice or a small child and gave me an award, all mine, just for me, grubby nubs off. Of course no good deed goes unpunished so now I have to give a list of 10 things I do daily and then pass on my award (after I have done very dirty things with it) to 5 innocent bystanders.

My Daily 10~~

1. My morning routine: After waking I do more in 45 minutes than most do all day long - shower, put the dogs out, feed the dogs, iron, let the dogs in, start breakfast, apply war paint, finish breakfast, let the dogs out, "do" hair, let the dogs in, clean the kitchen, slip into clothes, give dogs treats, make sure everything is shut up, locked up, rolled up & pinned up so the dogs can't have any fun while I'm at work - then

2. Attend my morning debriefing (who, what, when & where is classified).

2. I go to work.

3. Talk to Chi Chi.

4. Drink some highly caffeine laced liquid substance.

5. Do some bloggie reading because its the right thing to do.

6. Pre-plan, re-plan, day dream about my wedding with Nikki Sixx.

7. Have good intentions of going to the gym.

8. Talk myself out of going to the gym.

9. Call Nikki's manager to confirm any changes or updates with his life.

10. "Alone time"

Now without further ado - I give you 5 other people who have lots o'time on their hands:

Lousiana's Finest

Panty Dropper

No That Is Not A Pencil In My Pocket

The Big Apple

Don't Judge a Book By It's Cover

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Sing Along Time

Picture perfect memories, scattered all around the floor
Reaching for the phone 'cause I can't fight it anymore
And I wonder if I ever cross your mind
For me it happens all the time

It's a quarter after one, I'm all alone and I need you now
Said I wouldn't call but I've lost all control and I need you now
And I don't know how I can do without
I just need you now

Another shot of whiskey, can't stop looking at the door
Wishing you'd come sweeping in the way you did before
And I wonder if I ever cross your mind
For me it happens all the time

It's a quarter after one, I'm a little drunk and I need you now
Said I wouldn't call but I've lost all control and I need you now
And I don't know how I can do without
I just need you now

Guess I'd rather hurt than feel nothing at all

It's a quarter after one, I'm all alone and I need you now
And I said I wouldn't call but I'm a little drunk and I need you now
And I don't know how I can do without
I just need you now, I just need you now

Oh baby, I need you now

Need You Now~~Lady Antebellum

Monday, October 26, 2009

Man Candy Monday

Proof you can be Man Candy and a Silver Fox at the same time.

Sunday, October 25, 2009

What's Fair?

The fair is in town. When I was a child or even in my early teens - the fair was the stuff dreams were made of - cotton candy, hot guys, loud music & the smell of those you know you aren't supposed too - menthal cigarettes. As age has crept up and always on time, I've come to notice the fair is the stuff nightmares are made of. Not because of freaky side show tents featuring the snake woman, the world's largest rat and Korky the Clown or the "carnies" beckoning you to their junkie tin can rides with a sneer suggesting they could peel off your skin with the only two black teeth in their head, hide your body which would never be found in the grease trap to the funnel cake booth but because of the crowd the fair draws.

Some of us wait for Christmas morning, the day after Thanksgiving sales or for a bad hair cut to grow out but there are some who wait all year for the state fair. The people who wait for this festive event come in all sorts of thrasy flavors (for you bloggie readers who enjoy the fair, this does not mean you). The flavors include toothless, no bra wearing, dirty root rot hair having, camel toe lurking, trucker hat styling, mothers pushing a double baby stroller flaunting pants with the words "hit this" or "juicy" right across the ass, men boasting wife beaters with their white hairy bellies protruding from underneath, passles of kids snatching pens, golf tees and pamphlets advertising the services of Mr. Rooter from the booths in the exhibitor area because they are free, long haired hippy bikers decked out in all of their leather, overly fat people stuffing fried butter down their cake holes, young girls wearing shorts that would make Lady GaGa blush, older women wearing the same shorts and the token local train wreck celebrity who is a tatooed, overly tanned, pierced, coked up, always on her phone with an entourage of young skanks and old, dried up ladies with not one tooth in their mouth hoochie.

So you ask why do I subject myself to all of this? All I can say is who wouldn't? For the cost of $0 it is the best people watching anyone can experience.

Thursday, October 22, 2009

I Believe

in vodka cocktails before 10 am.

that there is good in everyone.

that blogging is cathartic.

that every morning at 6 am when I speak to the neighbor's cat Gus, in return he says "blow me".

in the power of suggestion.

that a bad hair day can ruin everything.

that lipstick makes everything a little better.

that dogs are people too.

that every thing happens for a reason.

that Nikki Sixx has purchased a 2 carat platinum classic Tiffany setting diamond ring and is on his way to ask me for my hand in rock n roll marriage.

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Overheard in Sam's

"Hey Sonny, do you know where the stool softener is?"


Monday, October 19, 2009

Man Candy Monday

Greek & greasy - sadly no dimples...but he just gets better with age.

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Mail Call

This arrived today VIA my e-mail -

I need a favor………………………

Go to the Dolla Store and buy a hood.

Stop by the gas station and buy something and tell them to put it in a bag.

Ride over to my office and stick your hand in the bag and bust thru the door and come kidnap me.

If you would...

I have not stopped laughing...

Autumn in New York

I was watching David Letterman last night - during his monologue he referenced Autumn in New York & how it could never get any better. With those words said - I thought of my friend Anthony & the pictures he sent me last week of his travels into the City from Brooklyn.

Autumn in New York
Why does it seem so inviting
Autumn in New York
It spells the thrill of first-nighting

glittering crowds and shimmering clouds
In canyons of steel
They're making me feel - I'm home

It's autumn in New York
That brings the promise of new love
Autumn in New York
Is often mingled with pain

Dreamers with empty hands
They sigh for exotic lands

It's autumn in New York
It's good to live it again
~~ Ella Fitzgerald - Autumn in New York

Throw Back Thursday

Obviously the picture above would be David Hasselhoff's glory days. From Michael Knight to Mitch Buchannon to a judge on America's Got Talent and finally playing himself as raving drunk trying to eat a hamburger..."don't Hassel the Hoff".

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Thought for the Day

How is it possible that some people can suck the life right out of you?

"Nothing ends nicely, that's why it ends"....

Monday, October 12, 2009

Man Candy Monday

Ladies & gents I give to you Jeffery Dean Morgan - tall, dark & dimpled.

Saturday, October 10, 2009

Baby Blue(s)

I hosted a baby shower today. Yes, you read that correctly - I hosted a baby shower. I have no love for kids but "the bun in the oven" will be my 2nd cousin. Baby Mama or as I like to refer to her as "Baby Bump" is my mother's sister's daughter or my first cousin. Love her, mean it. "Lil' Bits" first day in this world will be forced on November 23rd. Generally pregnancy of/by/for anyone makes me cringe with anxiety, desire of the unknown and gas but in this case I am elated. Elation has occurred because the "when are you gonna have a little one" questions have subsided while the attention is diverted elsewhere.

I have been following Baby Bump's pregnancy pretty closely - well as closely as one can without having a restraining order put against them. The curiosity of cravings is always my weakness. Baby Bump's cravings have been just two things thus far - Ramen noodles uncooked and raw bacon. Yes, raw bacon (makes gagging sounds). Out of the 8 months of gestation she has been sick 7 and with the nausea behind her - she has gained a total of 16 lbs. Not much I'd say for someone eating for two but what the fuck do I know? I mean, I eat for only one and can easily gain 16 lbs at one meal.

Ok, back to the shower stuff. "Lil Bits" is a boy so all decorations were blue- blue mints, blue plates, blue ribbons, blue toliet water, blue cake. All gifts were blue -blue onesies, blue socks, blue bottles, blue bibs (you get the idea). I am so glad Baby Bump did not get one of those disturbingly creepy breast pumps. The only thing missing from the shower was hooch. No one spiked the punch to my dismay. I thought it tacky if I had spiked the punch since I were hosting, so I brought in my own flask (in blue) and took nips in the men's bathroom, not really, but it would have been cool if I did.

With one shower down, one baby well on his way I can honestly say I am anxiously awaiting the arrival and not running for the hills.

Thursday, October 8, 2009

Throw Back Thursday

I had a ridiculous crush on Alex P. Keaton - even though at the age of 8, 10 or even 12 I never understood his humor.

"Of all the Basic Applied Economic Principles of Capitalism in the Post-Industrial Era Seminars in the world, you had to walk into mine". ~~ Alex P. Keaton

Oh yeah...this just happens to be my 200th post. Everyone else mentions a bloggie milestone - so I thought I would as well.

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Random Wednesday Me Me

Typically, I am not a "me-me" kinda gal but thought I'd walk on the wild side today. I took the cue from The Bug so here goes...

1. Tell me the absolute best way to watch a movie. On my TV, on my couch, under my blue blanket - alone.

2. Do you ever think about your own funeral? If so, do you have specific ideas about how you would like it to be? Yes I do. Music - Down in a Hole by Alice in Chains.

3. Are you more of a giver or a taker? Lately I feel like a giver with no reciprocation.

4. Vacations: planned activities and schedules, or play it by ear? Typically I like time frames for transit purposes. But, after arrival playing it by ear works.

5. What is one often overlooked item in your home that needs to be cleaned regularly? My basset hound. Due to her hound qualities, Gracie could use a bath every other day and she can't help it.

6. Name a cause that means a lot to you. Kimberly Needs A Handbag Fund . This particular cause is not really new but is making its way into the hearts of people worldwide.

7. Do you eat a regular old peanut butter jelly sandwich, or do you customize it? And by the way, jelly or no jelly? Regular PB&J for me...if it ain't broke, don't fix it.

8. If we were having a conversation in person, how would I know if you were nervous? Quivering voice, flushed cheeks - oh wait that is for something else.

9. Do you have an elaborate bedtime routine, or just the basics of toothbrushing and jammies? I grab Jack, my pomeranian & put him in the bed. I have long changed into my t-shirt & boxers before crawling into bed & then I watch some TV before nodding off.

10. Have you ever regretted something you wrote on your blog? Nope. The beauty of it being your blog - delete, delete, delete.

11. Has anyone ever told you that you look like a famous person or celebrity? Did you agree? I had super big hair and a shitty attitude back in the day and because of that hair & shitty attitude, I was told I looked like the bitchy sister, Tia, from Uncle Buck..

More recently and twice in a very short amount of time I was told I favored Catherine Zeta Jones. I assume its the dark hair, heavy eyes & the corners of my mouth curl upward like hers..

12. If you were going to dedicate a song to a loved one or friend, what would the song be and to whom would it be dedicated? Hmmm...there are so many thoughts & choices. But I think this dedication of No Suprise by Daughtry to Sancho works the best and I just bet he would agree.

Tuesday, October 6, 2009


I was chatting with a friend about KISS concert tickets. I told my friend I had located two tickets, floor section, 14 rows from the stage for $300.00 and then asked if they thought it would be worth it. My friend said that was a lot of money for KISS and then said "nooooo your worth $300 bucks". I said "fuck, I better be worth more than $300 bucks". I then got an "LOL" and the amount of $3,000,000,000,000 showed up and this followed "YES THAT IS 3 TRILLION AND YOUR WORTH EVERY PENNY OF IT AND THEN SOME..."

Oh yes, the power of suggestion.

Monday, October 5, 2009

Man Candy Monday

I am not a prime time TV watcher but after discovering this piece of candy, I might have to start. Look at those dimples...

Sunday, October 4, 2009

I'm Clumsy

It's true. No, no don't be jealous it is not as glamorous as it seems. After arriving home this afternoon from a day in the "country" I was walking up my front porch steps - all three of them. Before lifting my right foot off the top step I fell directly into the front door. Both hands were carrying covered plates of food that I brought from my mom's.

Contents of the first plate included:

Mac & cheese
Fried chicken
Smoked pork
Broccoli (chopping bra-koh-lee, choppin' bra-koh-lie)& rice casserole
Sweet potato casserole
One deviled egg
Some potato & cheese casserole concoction
Field peas

Contents of the second plate included:

Homecoming cake
Chocolate cake
Lemon pound cake
7-Up Cake
Pecan Pie

As fate has struck me with the art of clumsiness, luck also follows me, the plates doubled as a cushion thus preventing me from crashing through the front door which happens to be glass. Because falling & slinging food isn't enough for a pride crusher, my neighbor just happened to be in his front yard talking on the phone while the events took place.

My dogs, all four, gave me a score of 10.

Friday, October 2, 2009


This universal sign for FUCK YOU is for you - Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday & Thursday.

Many thanks to my secret boyfriend for lending his fingers.

Thursday, October 1, 2009

Throw Back Thursday

For the fellas...

Every stunt man needs some arm candy so I give you Jody Banks a/k/a Heather Thomas...candy on the arm of Colt Severs.

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