For the Child in All of Us

When I was a wee thing and long before you had 24 hour cartoon channels my cartoon viewing was limited to Saturday mornings, holiday specials and an hour in the afternoon. I would zip home from school and plop down in my great grandmother's chair and get ready for my mind candy. Nannie would serve me oatmeal cookies, ham sandwiches and grape Kool-Aid.

This is one of my favorites....enjoy.

Wake & Bake

In honor of pot heads, stoners and tokers everywhere and to one really, really special bowl hitter straight from Brooklyn by way of Greenpoint: Happy 420




"When I was in England I experimented with marijuana a time or two, and I didn't like it. I didn't inhale". ~~ Bill Clinton, U.S. President

Happy Rolling!

Pet Those Peeves

I am not perfect or at least I tell myself that and due to that fact that I am almost always trying to appear perfect I try to watch my mannerisms in front of others. For those of you who aren't quite sure of the exact meaning I'll share it with you:

Pet Peeve - a particular and often continual annoyance; personal bugbear

My list of pet peeves is anything but short and some might not exactly be a pet peeve but a lack of manners:

Nose pickers
Butt-er-inners
Ladies who don't cross their legs
Men who don't open doors for others
Smacking
Chewing with mouth open
Reaching for more of something when their plate is already full
Elbows on the table while eating a meal
Not wanting someone to be happy for their own well being
Telling me "no" I don't need something
Telling me "no" not to do something
People that tell me I should settle down
Not offering thank yous or your welcomes
People who pull out their EBT card or food stamp card from their Dooney & Bourke wallet which was pulled of out of their matching Dooney & Bourke handbag
Not making eye contact when you talk to someone
Lazy people ie. not doing housework no matter how big or small the chore is
People who always talk about their illnesses

I promise I am not spotting nor am I hungry. I just find myself getting so irritated over what are seemingly small things but it is all of those small things that evolve into one large thing.

I am gonna go now and try to work on being perfect.

Random Thoughts 17

Who decided these food items together would be the gospel of certain combinations?:

Coffee & donuts
Milk & cookies
Chips & salsa
Steak & potatoes
Ravi & oli
Bacon & eggs

With these above perfect combinations in mind, let me give you a list of my weird eats:

Mayonnaise & field peas, black-eyed peas or purple hull butter beans
Pineapple & mayonnaise sandwich
Cheese pizza & chocolate pudding
New York Style cheesecake & marinara sauce
Cole slaw, grilled onions wrapped in a tortilla shell with cheese sauce

What time will you be over for dinner?

Jibberish

Sixteen years from now I will be 50 years old. I can't even imagine who I will be or where I will be. I fight time and aging every day - anti-aging detoxifying face scrub, skin renewal moisturizer with an SPF of 15, anti-fatigue eye cream, age defying make-up, anti-wrinkle lip stick but ultimately time will march on across my face not caring what numerical age I reach. Everyone is always in a hurry to grow up then everyone grows up and tries to slow down. I believe the years between 30 - 60 are lost in some sort of accelerated time warp. "It's important to have a twinkle in your wrinkle". ~~ Author Unknown

For no reason today, in the early hours of the morning I cried. I sat on the edge of a bed looked at the ceiling and cried. No sobbing, no wailing, no snot mustaches just silent tears. We, you and I, cry for all sorts of reasons - sadness, happiness, because your pants won't button, because something is so funny, because something touches us, because our heart is broken, because we broke a heart and because of physical pain but the tears are the same. Why is that? "Tears are the safety valve of the heart when too much pressure is laid on it". ~~ Albert Smith

Sing Along Time

Never thought I needed anyone,
Or anything to get me through
Come to close and then I'd start to run,
Just to stay one step ahead of you

I’d see others walking hand and hand,
And say to say to myself “what a couple of fools”
How could one woman just love one man?
And not tear his heart in two.

Fools chase love around so desperately,
Until they wind up all alone
Shouldn’t love come more naturally,
Like a river cuts into a stone

That's why I,
I love you for loving me,
It’s a rare and precious thing.
You cant run from love that’s meant to be,
Just let it shine on everything.

Oh It took a little while,
But I found myself.
Right where I did not need to be,
I tried to put the blame on someone else
When it all came crashing all down on me.

That’s why I,
I love you for loving me,
It’s a rare and precious thing.
You can’t run from love that’s mean to be.
So let it shine on everything,
Oh let it shine on everything, Yea.

Love You Loving Me ~~ Stoney Larue

No Rhyme, All Reason

Even though Hell is full someone decided to let one more in and the gates of hell flew open wide just for me...the lady of fire and brimstone decided they loved my blog and I must add - what's not to love?

I should tell her thank you but since she is writhing in evil what is the point? The point is to rise above and take the high road. Thank you Blazing Scarlet, thank you for loving my blog and for smiting me an evil doer. It gets no better than this.

Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow

I barely escaped he early 90's with my extra large, teasing it to Jesus poufy hair. I luckily traded in my teased bangs and shoulder length curly locks for a super short red number via Bridget Fonda's role in Singe White Female - thank the Lord because I haven't used hair spray since. I swear when my hair was falling to the floor it was sighing and whispering "thank God, she has no idea of how stupid she made us look".

I can't help but think if I were African American that I would have sported a jheri curl or burgundy finger waves.

Rhianna has asked my man to be in a video - Rockstar 101, he declined. Kat Von D is tweeting that they are back together after their two month "break", I have not gotten Nikki's confirmation either way. People, ladies please keep your hands to yourselves. I have enough to worry about.

When the world gets me down & boy does it ever...I think of Dory.

Hey Mr. Grumpy Gills
You know what you gotta do when life gets you down?
Just keep swimming
Just keep swimming
Just keep swimming swimming swimming
What do we do we swim, swim, swim
OH HO HO How I love to swim
When you WAAAAAANNTTT to swim you want to swim

Overheard at Work

"I wish I were single so I could get a good piece of ass".

First you have to consider the source. Then you have to consider the source's spouse - I know looks aren't everything but they sure do help.

You Know You're Old Enough When...

You want to hide the Easter eggs & not hunt them.

You wake up at 5:00 am on the weekends just because.

You actually schedule doctor appointments.

You realize your attitude doesn't determine your altitude.

You call in sick to work because you are really sick.

You seek your mother's advice.

Going to bed at 8pm every night doesn't make you seem like a loser.

You realize Pizza Rolls & Bud Light longnecks aren't a well balanced meal.

You get heartburn dreaming of a 3 martini lunch.

You send thank you cards for thank you cards.

You know spending a day at the beach takes alot of effort.

Disappointment takes the place of anger.

In My Thoughts

Disasters happen all the time but when they are in our own backyard it tends to affect me alot more and a bit differently.

Man Candy Monday - Pollock Addition

Happy Dyngus Day to all of my Polish friends, well actually to only one specific Pollock in Mobile. In honor of this under appreciated day I give you Liev Schreiber who is just a smidgen Polish.

Uśmiech!

Happy Easter!

Trumped!

A co-worker found out last week he has Multiple Myeloma . The co-worker and I were talking about his situation & another co-worker popped out of their office while we were talking to put in their two cents or give their diagnosis/prognosis and then trumps the ailing co-worker's cancer with their nieces colon cancer.

Who in the fucking world tries to get a better hand in the game of cancer? Couldn't they just let him have his cancer moment?

Question....

If you had the choice of:

Being pretty or handsome but your personality & character were awful
or
Being fat but having an awesome personality and kind heart that drew everyone to you
or
Being pretty & skinny but had an awful disposition, personality and a disease that wasn't fatal

Which would you choose?