Thursday, November 5, 2009

Hello, 911, What Is Your Emergency?

The following are actual events that took place at my home during the hours of 1:20 am - 2:20 am on November 4, 2009:

Dog barks.
Doorbell rings.
Boyfriend says "our door bell rang".
I say "no it didn't".
Five minutes pass.
Doorbell rings and rings.
All four dogs go into frenzy, then into sniper mode - including the one who is mostly deaf.
Boyfriend gets out of bed & grabs his gun. That's right a G.U.N.
He walks to the dining room.
I walk to the living room.
Boyfriend says "don't open the front door".
I say "you don't open the front door".
I peek thru the blinds of the living room window. I see a woman standing on our porch. I say "I have no idea who that is".
For whatever reason we decide to open the door. The lady is the girlfriend of the dude who lives across the street.
She says "Josh won't give me my keys, he is drunk & he threatening to punch out my lights".
I say "what the fuck".
I go back in to get my wits about me.
I return to the front porch & tell her to use my phone. She comes in, is mumbling and is scared.
Josh arrives.
Another neighbor who also had ding dong ditch'em played on him arrives.
Josh is laughing & I tell him this is not funny.
He beckons for his girlfriend to come outside. She won't. She has called the PoPo.
Boyfriend tells Josh to go & get her keys and let her leave. He goes & then returns with them. Looks like he is going to throw them through the glass door at her. But the boyfriend intervenes.
Josh tells the girlfriend "when they(the PoPo) show up, if they take me away, I will deal with you later".
PoPo shows up. Stories are told. Girlfriend refers to Josh as an ex-boyfriend & Josh says "oh, so you are breaking up with me now". PoPo says to Josh "you have two choices 1. go home & don't come back out 2. You can take a ride downtown."
Girlfriend leaves. Cop leaves. Neighbor leaves. We go back to bed.
Another cop shows up at our house. Boyfriend tells him what went down. Cop sees my Longhorn t-shirt & they start talking about football.

16 comments:

Just telling it like it is said...

Omgosh it sounds like we are twins...My boyfriend has like 20 guns, but he went A&M....What can I say we love football...

Jo said...

Omigosh, did you manage to get any sleep?

Why do I have the feeling you will be hearing more from them?

UBERMOUTH said...

HAHAHAHAHA.

I had a similar scenario with a next door victim of domestic violence knocoking on my door for assistance. I called police for her aand whilst on the phone her 'man' came out and pointed a shotgun at me through the window threatening to kill me.

I moved out THAT day[when the police said they could not arrest him for death threats as it was not said over phone or in letter and was only heat of moment thing. WTF?'

She went back to him,refusing to press charges or make him leave. When I returned a week later[ I had stayed in hotel] to collect my things as I had found a new place. The ambulance/police were taking her [dead] body out of her house.
One shouldn't tolerate domestic abuse[or a man with a gun]

The Savage said...

Wow. What an interesting life you lead....

Kimberly said...

Just Tellin - Hook 'Em Horns!!!

Jo - Josh came over to our house yesterday afternoon as soon as the Boyfriend got home. Josh apologized & said he and his girlfriend worked things out (imagine that, so the cycle continues). The BF told him the next time you want to beat the shit outta your girlfriend, keep in your own home. Sounds wrong but I can't help but agree.

Uber - drama queen you are.

Savage - not entirely.

f1trey said...

jeeze louise--- sounds like everything but fun..... guys are jerks when it comes to crap like that....

The Bug said...

Domestic disputes are so scary. Our downstairs neighbors often fought & one night I swear it sounded like they were throwing furniture at each other. She gave as good (or bad!) as she got. Someone in our building called the police & the couple was gone the next day.

Joe Corbati said...

You made me spill my popcorn.

I Say What You're Thinking and I'M The Bitch? said...

That's HYSTERICAL!!!!!!

UBERMOUTH said...

Hahaha drama queen?

I would not be sitting here now if not for my swift actions of that day. I am a redhead and in a crowd of course we'd be the first person shot. It's only logical. Ask pantie dropper- she knows abot logistics[in a biblical sense]

In any event,every word of my story was true!

Bitch!

KrippledWarrior said...

Thank God for armed citizens.
Seriously. God created men and women. Samuel Colt made them equal.

Bina said...

Good God. People freaking amaze me. And they talk about football. Sounds just like men, huh?

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